Skip to main content

The End of a Really Short Rope

Is it really too much to ask that my kids. . .
  • put their shoes in the baskets in the mudroom?
  • hang their jackets up on the hooks?
  • NOT TOUCH ANYTHING but their matchbox cars?

Seriously. Don't touch anything. That includes the Christmas tree, the ornaments that you insist on using as soccer balls, the wrapping paper, and all items of food in the pantry. Also, please don't ask me to make you chicken nuggets. Don't ask me to turn on the Backyardigans for the 500-millionth time. And the tape- for hells sake- LEAVE MY TAPE ALONE! DO NOT wrap it around your head.

I have officially hit the "You-Are-Driving-Me-Crazy" Mom Wall. It's 11:24 in the late morning.

Aaron keeps asking me what I want for Christmas. And my answer is this;

  • a house that will stay clean for at least 24 hours.
  • a good book
  • a moment of peace and quiet
  • and these mocs. . .




That is all I want. You can tell me how much you love me, and how I'm your favorite wife EVER tonight as we battle the kids together. You wear the body armor, and I will wear camouflage. And know that right now I am singing U2's "Baby, Please Come Home" as I write.

Seriously. Just come home.





Comments

rabidrunner said…
You have seriously taken the words right out of my mouth (especially the part about only touching the matchbox cars)! Except for the part about the mocs. And maybe the part about Aaron. I don't want to wear camouflage with Aaron.

I do, however, have a couple of items to add:

1) Can you just get dressed? Without being poked and prodded and yelled at and sworn at?

2) Can you just eat your breakfast? Wihtout being poked and prodded and yelled at and sworn at?

3) Can you just brush your damn teeth? Without being poked and prodded and yelled at and sworn at?

Mandee thanks so much. That seriously made my day.
12/17/08, 12:40 PM
Wendy said…
I've thought about tying mine down to their beds this afternoon, with a sippy cup that has a bendy straw in reach and putting them in pull ups in case of accidents. That way I can take a nap.

Just dreamin.....
12/17/08, 12:41 PM
Mandee said…
Yes... the eating breakfast, the getting dressed, the brushing teeth- the lost shoes, the missing jacket- ALL things I dealt with this morning that sent me over the edge.

Except I had to give up use of the word "damn" when Max started repeating it. It was my only and favorite swear word.

And to Wendy- such a great idea. I think I'll try it.
12/17/08, 1:08 PM
Reynolds Family said…
Okay, I'm just laughing! This is my life. I couldn't have said it better myself.
12/17/08, 1:53 PM
Kim said…
I told jared my goal in life is to be able to sit down at the end of the day and think to myself "There is nothing left to be cleaned, laundered, folded, or put away. Now I will sit down and watch my favorite shows with a extra large diet coke and some snickers and peanut butter cups and relax." Jared informed me I will probably die before that ever happens. A girl can dream though. I say shoot for a clean house for 12 hours. I personally would take a clean house for 3 hours but even that will never happen.
12/17/08, 2:35 PM
Aimee said…
Ben is never home anymore, he goes straight from work to jiu jitsu and gets home at 8:30 after the kids are in ben and sits on his butt and never lifts a finger around the house. I cleaned the house yesterday while the kids were at school..by 8:00 last night it looked like a tornado had hit so I calmly said, "Clean your crap up or I'm throwing it all away!!" and then locked myself in the office. 20 minutes later I came out and it looked worse than before...and I lost it. I lost it big time. Ben came home at this point and I have to say the house has never looked better. :)
12/17/08, 4:00 PM
Heidi and Rich said…
Kids = Chaos this is the only thing that helps me through the crazy days. Moments of peace, cleanliness, sharing of toys, eating food without complaining, are just things that we may be blessed with on occasion but once we think we deserve them on a daily basis depression kicks in because it will never be. At least we can dream about it (when they are asleep).
12/17/08, 4:15 PM
Hailey said…
ALL of these reasons are why I chose afternoon Kindergarten, right during the twins' naps. Sometimes I just sit there and listen to the silence...

Cheap thrills, man, cheap thrills...
12/17/08, 4:20 PM
brooke said…
You forgot "Get in the damn car!"
12/17/08, 8:44 PM
Jenn N. said…
Also, can I just go to the bathroom in my little toilet room all by myself? How is it the entire family can fit in there with me???

Thanks for making me laugh today. Sorry it was at your expense.
12/17/08, 8:53 PM
Stefanie said…
Ah yes, this is an all too familiar post- and I only have one! Seriously, I can totally identify and it actually makes me feel more "normal" to know that other people feel that way too...thanks for making me feel like i'm not the only mom out there who has bad days and whose kids put them over the edge every now and again. Good thing they're cute.

Seriously, what type of frosting to you like on your chocolate cake?
12/17/08, 9:56 PM
Laura and the family said…
Yup, I totally get it! How about telling your kids (even with my two boys) by saying, "How many times do I have to tell you to do this?" I often would ended up hearing them, "Many times" and then do nothing. I lost my fuse and shoved them into the shower-- especially when it is time to take a shower.

Or how about telling them to clean the toys up and ended up telling you that, "He did the mess?" Then the other one tell me, "No, I didn't do that. He did that!" Felt like pulling my hair out...

Santa Claus will forgive you for using the new darnest word :-)
12/17/08, 11:08 PM
Neva said…
This too shall pass............to soon by the way.
Just hang in there and enjoy what you can.
Love, Mom
12/18/08, 7:30 AM
Katie D. said…
Love it. So real.

Also, I saw some cheetah mocs in Macy's ad. Totally thought they looked like you.
12/18/08, 10:55 AM
Alison said…
Is it okay if Jack hangs out in his exersaucer all day? 'Cuz I don't want to worry about what might be on my floor that he could put in his mouth. I don't want to count to three for Erin to clean up and have her say "2 1/2" after I say 2. I don't want to go in the bathroom to change a tampon and have one of my girls ask me if I'm "eating candy in there". Is that too much to ask? =)
12/18/08, 5:26 PM
Em. said…
Have I ever told you I LOVE YOU? I have known why you are one of my best buds forever now, but it has just all been confirmed again. Really, you are the best and I hope you know you are loved. Thank you for the pee in my pants. I needed that today. A great laugh. Sorry it was at your expense.
12/18/08, 10:28 PM
Em. said…
Oh ps I would tell you that since we are good friends I would take the boys for the day, but then my children and yours would be very sad.(because I am ALWAYS at the end of my rope) How about babysitters and a drink? What time should I come get you?
12/18/08, 10:31 PM
Brown Family said…
LOVE this post! I feel this way SO MUCH! Glad to know that I am not alone. :) Fortunate for ALL OF US, these kids do get bigger and grow up...(I have to keep telling myself that b/c right now I don't believe it!) ENJOY your Christmas and I hope you get those slippers...you deserve them!
12/21/08, 10:58 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Snowball Cookies

[image]
It snowed this week. And though we don't have many family traditions, one that we started when we became a family was to make Snowball Cookies on the first snowy day of the season. And since we like cookies so much, we usually make them on other random, snowy days, too. They help ease my pain and anxiety over winter. You know-- carbs. 
There is nothing better than Snowball Cookies and hot chocolate on a snowy day.
Snowball Cookies 1 c. butter 1/2 c. confectioners sugar 2 tsp. vanilla 2 c. sifted flour 1 c. chocolate chips 1 c. chopped pecans (an option I don't use) Additional confectioners sugar (for rolling)
Beat butter and sugar until creamy. Add remaining ingredients, mix. Use a teaspoonful (I use a small ice cream scoop) of dough and roll into small ball. Bake at 375 degrees for 12 to 15 minutes. Cool slightly and roll in confectioners sugar. (I roll them twice.)

14 comments
Read more

I HATE Walmart

And I am never shopping there again.

Aaron and I joke every time we are in that store that it smells like a fart. But it's really not very funny, because it does smell like someone tooted. In every Walmart I've been in, I've smelled someone's stink. It makes me want to puke. But I go back because it's cheap- I am always able to get all of my groceries and then some for around $100. And I can also grab some fabric, tires, and plants for my yard while I'm grocery shopping.

Saturday night, Maddy and I made a late night dash to Walmart. I needed groceries, and she needed some material to make a pillow in one of her classes at school. The first thing I went to put in my shopping cart was french bread. No french bread. None. Anywhere. I didn't even necessarily need the fresh stuff. I would've taken the stuff in the plastic bag with the twist tie, but they didn't even have that. Second on my list- tator tots. (I've heard from a million people that a ce…
16 comments
Read more

Coming & Going

(November 2012)
In November of 2012, Parker came home from serving a mission in Florida.  I can't even begin to describe the complete JOY (there is no other word for it) a parent (yes, even a "step-parent") feels when their child, or man child as was Parker's case, comes home after being away for 2 whole years.  And Parker's mission was the absolute longest mission ever.  He was gone FOR.EV.ER. 

Maddy's friend,Jedidiah Thunell, was there to capture Parker's arrival at the airport, and then made this awesome video to help us remember that day.  Incredible talent- that boy will have an Academy Award someday. 

Elder Parker Grant from Grantma and Grantpa on Vimeo.
This past August, Maddy left to serve a mission in Denmark.  We knew from our experience with Parker that the curbside drop off is rushed and hurried, and I thought we were prepared this time around- experienced, seasoned missionary parents.  We pulled up to the curb, and saw one of her friends f…
2 comments
Read more